Tuesday, June 28, 2011

mood of today

"God may forgive your sins, but your nervous system won't”
 Alfred Korzybski 
Thats kind of how i feel today.... Not the bad, feeling of impending doom kind of nervous, but the goofy silly kind of nervous. Excited and anxious all at the same time.  I just had to share, thought sharing would ease it for a minute but I was wrong....still nervous haha....  

Monday, June 27, 2011

what would I buy????

GBE week # 6 ....Picture Prompt

This week , as part of the GBE 2 (group blogging experience), is to blog about the above picture. We are to discuss our feelings and thoughts about this picture. I am 100% sure that we'll all share the same exact reaction if we woke up to see this tree growing in our backyard it would be JOY, uncontrolable JOY!! My mind races through ALL the things that I would use that money on, some things practical, some frivilous, some selfish and some self-less.But I scaled down the list of over thousands of things and I decided to list some of them here for your viewing pleasure :

1)  I would buy a beach house. On a nice beach somewhere, in a house that I can smell the sea air and hear the pounding of the surf. This would be the top of my list and would be done about 30 seconds after i discovered the money tree :)

2)  I would lend a helping hand to the people that mean the most to me in my life:  my mom, my dad, my cousins and uncle and aunts and of course my best friend.  I would pay off their houses or buys them ones, pay off their bills and relieve some of the everyday money stress so they could enjoy life with me.

3)  Buy myself a Jeep Wrangler.  This would probably be #2 but I dont want to look totally selfish hehe. I have dreamed about owning a jeep before I could even drive.( i dont know why I have never got one but maybe next time) Top down, cooler and overnight bag in the back and Im off on an adventure....sounds great right now...

4)  Disney Vacation for all my friends and family.  I cant think of a better way to enjoy my new money than with a vacation of a lifetime to the Happiest place on earth. Seeing the joys and wonder on everyones faces (even the adults) is worth a million bucks!!!

5)   Harry Winston Diamond Necklace and a pair of Christian Louboutin's ........  Girls I dont have to even explain these 2 right????? hahahaha I would die a happy girl if I was to go wearing these two !!!

7)  Travel..... Travel....Travel......... everywhere... I want to see all the places I have been dying to go including one of these over the water bungalows in bora bora.  I have been lucky enough to see many more places than the average person because of my career but travel is my blood... gypsy at heart i guess....

BUT ...................................
..............................................................I would give it all away...the houses and cars and trips and diamonds and yes even the red-bottomed dream louboutins if I could buy ONE MINUTE more with my aunt or grandma who i loved more than life itself and miss every day.  Loved ones are priceless, worth more than gold and diamonds and can be gone as quickly as the sand on that beach. So buy time with them...thats the only thing worth spending that tree money on !!!!!

my mood for today


Excitement Definition

The act of exciting, or the state of being roused into action, or of having increased action; impulsion; agitation; as, an excitement of the people.

That which excites or rouses; that which moves, stirs, or induces action; a motive.

A state of aroused or increased vital activity in an organism, or any of its organs or tissues.

Butterflies In My Stomach Pictures, Images and Photos

Saturday, June 25, 2011

priceless gift from my aunt

My aunt has come to visit me. I haven't seen her in over a year and I am so happy that I am able to spend time with her and catch up. But the most exciting thing about her visit is that she brought with her a box. It is about the size of 2 shoe boxes combined and has some girly flowers on the outside. I was not sure what she had in there but it could be anything when it comes to my aunt. But this time i was pleasantly surprised. It was a box full of old family photos and I mean OLD. There was one photo of my great grandmother when she was in her 20's and was an actress. It is awesome!  We went thru the pics and she shared stories and info about the basically strangers since most were long gone when i arrived.  I loved looking at them and I especially loved the ones of my grandpa in World War II.  But out of all them I love the picture below the most. Its just a simple pic of my grandparents but it says so much. I just love their body language.  It makes me happy to see the love they had for each other even after 4 kids haha...

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

I Want one now!! :)

first love kindergaten style!!

GBE 2 Week #5 topic -  FIRST LOVE (GBE is the group blogging experience where a topic is posted each week and then we blog about it. this week was a very interesting topic ..i enjoyed it )

“The magic of first love is our ignorance that it can ever end” ~   Benjamin Disraeli

I know I should probably be writing about the first time I ,MYSELF, fell in love but that is not really an interesting story...pretty standard....girl likes boy...boy says he likes girl...girl falls in love ...boy falls into the backseat of a car with another girl....girl eats gallon of baskin and robbins ice creme ...haha. Much more interesting is the first time someone fell in love with ME (besides the people that were obligated to ). It was on the playground of PS13 on the first day of my Kindergarten year. We were all waiting to go in the class and from what i was told by my mother 98% of us were crying and clinging to our parents legs. But me, the only child dying for conversation with a peer and not my mom and her friends, was super eager to get in that class and make some friends. Thats when i saw him, a timid boy with a bowl cut and the most roundest big brown eyes I had ever seen. His name was Jason and as i would find out, he was another only child but just not quite as eager as me. So being the bossy little redhead i was  and sensing his fear, i grabbed his hand and marched him right into that school. Never looking back at my mom or the parents or the 28 other screaming crying kids. And from that moment he was in love. He followed me everywhere. Always sat with me, ate with me, played with me, colored with me and YES, even Napped with me( i know it was a scandal...i would have been branded with the scarlet letter by the other 5 yrs olds but they didn't know their letters yet....thank god!!! hahaha) His mother was constantly telling my mom how he wouldn't stop talking about me or asking to come to my house and crying when she said no.. so on most occasions he was there... and we did everything from playing to watching sesame street to even  dancing around to my moms Grease album.  Of course at the time I didn't know he loved me, I just thought he was someone that allowed me to boss him around and ALWAYS let me win at candyland. I only later realized that only a man who is truly in love, will let a girl win at any game especially candyland ( that game is cut throat hahaha). It was a beautiful year long love affair until the fateful following September day when we were ripped apart from each other...screaming and crying and vowing our eternal love....well not exactly like that extreme. I went to a catholic school for first grade and he stayed behind in PS 13 and the distance was just took great for our adolescent love to handle. I often wonder what happened to Jason and about who eventually won his heart. I hope he is happy but secretly i hope he still carries a little torch for me..and refers to me as the one who got away :) 

Saturday, June 18, 2011

my latest tiny buddha find!!


Awesome article about 50 things you can control in your life right now.  Very helpful for me since i feel out of control!!!  i want to get some of these done !!    :)  :)

Friday, June 17, 2011

seeing the rainbow

this is a picture i took a couple years ago of a rainbow near my house. That day i took it as a sign or a blessing or a message of good luck that was coming my way.  I wish i could say I won the lotto the next day or I suddenly came across a pot of gold but I didnt.  and even through I experienced some recent troubles which include a layoff, a relationship ending and major health problem, I still consider myself a lucky person. I have a great family, some great friends, a nice home to live in but mostly I recently had someone come into my life that is changing it for the better. He is helping try and find the rainbow again or the silver lining on a dark cloud . Sometimes someones gently hand can be stronger than steel!!
I guess that rainbow WAS telling me of something good coming my way...it just took a while for him to find me in the storm.... :)

> "But every step I thought of you;
Every footstep only you,
And every star a grain of sand,
The leavings of a dried up ocean.
Tell me, how much longer? How much longer?"

it is "National eat your vegetables day" !!!!

EAT ME !!! :)   Have your recommended servings of veggies and stay healthy !!!

Thursday, June 16, 2011

pics of teddy

hi some people have been asking about my puppy teddy (aka the beast) haha..so i thought id post some pics here... He is a rescue puppy from adoptalab.org a shelter in Indiana.They were part of Operation little dog, a mission to save petmill puppies that were being killed in Missouri after the state government outlawed puppy mills.  We got him in march and he was a part of the family within hours ...I hope you enjoy him as much as we do...(even when hes using my toes as a chew toy) ........


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

You can not always control circumstances, but you can control your own thoughts.” ~ Charles Popplestown

I belong to a group on Facebook called the GBE 2 (group blogging experience 2...the original group was on MySpace...you remember MySpace right?? ). Every week a new topic will be posted and everyone will in their own way will blog about the topic. This weeks topic is about CONTROL, which got me thinking and thinking hard (can you smell the smoke?? haha). I didn't know which way to approach this topic so i just chose to list some things with control in mind > Here is my list of 8 things:

1. I love the CONTROL the remote. I am horrible. Maybe i have a touch of A.D.D or maybe I should have been born a boy but I just love the remote and I never stay on one program. Constantly flipping, flipping ,flipping finding 3 or 4 programs i really like but in the end never seeing the beginning or ending of any of them because im too busy flipping haha

2. I would love to CONTROL my puppy's biting and barking. I know he is a baby but i feel like a pin cushion sometimes and i cant get on the phone without him barking the whole time (rolling my eyes) haha

3. I wish I could have a better CONTROL over my sleep or more importantly the LACK of sleep. I know there are so many factors in my life and mind that control my sleep patterns but I wish just one night i could sleep soundly without nightmares or waking 10 times.

4. I would love to CONTROL a small country especially if its on an island somewhere. I would make an excellent Queen...im just saying hahahaa

5. I pray for some strength when i comes to my health. I know a lot is out of my CONTROL but I need to be strong and that is easier said than done sometimes.

6. I am trying to CONTROL my thoughts both negative and positive. The positive is always the easier for me to gravitate towards so I want to get a better handle on the positive one....especially believing the positive ones... i want to believe them but my fear takes over.

7. 5 things i can CONTROL right this second: my smiles, my ability to give someone a compliment, the food that goes in my mouth, my curses (i have a little bit of a potty mouth) and my response time to calls and emails (im a slacker sometimes)


8. 5 things I wish i could CONTROL: my negative thoughts about myself; the power of the past over me; my fear of being hurt again; my fears about my health and finally I wish i could control my minds doubts when someone says they love me. that's the hardest one to control by far.

Sometimes I wish i could just release some control into the hands of others or the universe or god but I know in the end it is only in my hands to CONTROL my future and happiness. And I am ready for the challenge!!!!!

this is for " D " .... :)

first steps

This is my first steps at trying a blog..im sure like a baby i will be unsteady at first but I am going to try my best to write about different things that touch my heart ...Thanks for coming along on this journey with me....